My last post was a letter to the father of my child. Yep, that's right. I've had a baby. A beautiful baby boy.
He's nearly three months old now. The first few weeks of his life have been... utter chaos. I won't get into great detail in this post, but I am just gonna take a moment to talk about postpartum.
My mind, my body, and my spirit are forever changed.
- My mind.. Between the hormones, the sleep deprivation, and the pre-existing mental health issues rearing up, I feel like a hot mess.
- My body.. Stretched, stitched, scarred. My body feels foreign to me, it's like I'm learning how to love this new physical version of myself.
- My spirit.. Transformed. From the moment this sweet child was placed in my arms, I felt a love like no other.
Parenthood is a wild ride, full of ups, downs, twists and bends, and so much love. But there's also been a lot of hurt. And at the moment, his father and I are separated. Will we get back together? I don't know. I'm trying not to make any big decisions, and taking things one day at a time.
I just want to be the best mum I can be, and give him every opportunity to grow into the best little human. That's a lot of pressure to put on myself, huh?
All I can do is my best. One day at a time.
